K for K

So want to go here, but my knees are failing me..

Blessing or Burden?

(Photo source: http://digital-photography-school.com)

See the blessing in the burden.

It was only recently when my family has been caught in the middle of a not-so-good situation. I have lost buckets of tears contemplating on what is currently going on and asking God for protection and assistance. Human as I am, I have, at times, wondered how all these can be happening to our family. I have asked God what could be the reason for all these, but I have yet to understand... until late this afternoon.

I sent my dad a text message telling him to take care as he goes home. I'd be coming home at a later time, so we won't be traveling together. My SMS was simple: "Pauwi ka na ba? Ok. Ingat. Godbles" But it was way different from the usual SMS I'd send had not for the current situation, which would be more like "Pauwi ka na? Ok." Yeah, that's it. Just two sentences and a period.

It was then that I realized what a blessing this burden of a situation has brought us. It has made the two of us more expressive of our concern for each other. It has brought us closer to each other faster than we had tried in 27 years. This is the blessing: my dad and I having a better relationship because of this burden.

Yes, I still do not like everything that has been going on. I still am not sure why all these are happening. But I am secure that God has a reason for all these and that He will never let go of us. I can choose to focus on the burden, or I can choose to look beyond it and see the greater blessing. I choose the latter.

I thank God today.

Today has been a day of tears. My tear glands had been on high gear almost the whole day for a couple of reasons. I needed a hug but didn't want to bother people of this need. Everyone seems a little more busy than usual (me included). But I am glad I still got a hug, although a virtual one, from my bestfriend Mazel, who's in Japan. I thank God for that today.

Today has been a day of reconciliation. Went to Greenbelt Chapel to attend First Friday mass with Joanne. Cannot help but cry even more during mass (darn these tear glands!) but had a great confession afterward. I say great, because, for a long time, it is only now that I actually enjoyed talking to a priest over confession. My bad, I didn't get the name of the priest, but he was full of wisdom, practical, and straight to the point. Hadn't there been a ton of other people waiting outside the confession box, I would have asked a lot more questions and had a longer conversation with him. I related well with his comments, learned so much from his advices, and was affirmed of my beliefs. I thank God for that today.

Today has been a day of terrific crepes. After draining my tear glands dry, had a huge plate of mango crepe from the nearby Cafe Breton at GB3 with Joanne and Veena. I love crepe! I enjoyed my La Pinay and I thank God for that today.

Today has been a day of lessened expectations. I have always been reminded to lessen my expectations of people; I just fail to keep that in mind, so the next time something happens that falls short of such expectations, I get seriously disappointed. But today is a reminder that to have less expectations of people is to live happier. I thank God for that today.

Today has been a day of love that is better expressed. He has always been the quiet type, never inquisitive and often only silent. He cares but never shows it explicitly. He protects but never too obviously. He worries about me but never admits it. He loves but never conveys it in words. Today has been different; he showed his care, protection, and love ever more fully. He is my dad and I thank God for him today.

(Photo sources: http://www.nottingham-therapy.co.uk, http://www.ssmaryandjohn.co.uk, http://blog.lib.umn.edu, http://visitpinas.com, http://www.allfunnystuff.com)